Lately, thanks to Nando, I've spent some time perusing "College Misery." And I've even made a couple of posts on it.
As I begin a new semester, I think of all of the irresponsible, manipulative and just plain immature behavior I've seen from students. I don't think most of us who became college faculty members had any idea that we'd encounter such things; at least, they weren't on our minds as we pursued our degrees and dreamt of "a life of the mind" or some such thing.
As much as I empathize with the other contributors, I can't help but to notice a lot of student-bashing. Yes, students' acts (or inaction) can be frustrating. And, they are--at least according to the law--adults and therefore accountable for their actions. However, I have learned that young people, whether consciously or not, almost always imitate their elders and express those values they learn from said elders, and their environments.
So the "little snowflakes" lie to your face? Make excuses? Text their friends while you're talking to them? Simply "forget" things? Well, guess what? They've figured out--again, consciously or unconsciously--that their schools, families and communities, and the society in which they live, reward such behaviors. Or, at least, those behaviors aren't penalized.
I'm thinking now of a younger man I dated a couple of years ago. The term "dysfunctional family" has been used to describe any and all kinds of unpleasantness. However, his family fits just about any definition of that term. They are all addicts of one kind or another and can only communicate with each other through screaming and threats, and navigate the turbulence (which they helped to create) of their home through all manner of lying and manipulation.
Guess what my now-ex did when he was with me. Now you know why he's an ex.
The difference is that he was old enough to choose to behave differently. Most 18- and 19-year olds are not mature enough, or simply don't have enough life experience, to know that they can be different from what they've learned how to be.
The thing is, there's absolutely no incentive for them (or my ex, for that matter) to do so. If CEO's can, through recklessness and fraud, bring the world's economy to the brink and be rewarded for their behavior with bailouts and bonuses, what can we tell young people about personal responsibility?
If politicians can lie to get themselves elected, or to take us into a war, what can we teach students about the importance of being truthful?
If schools won't stand behind their policies on plagiarism and other academic dishonesty, what reason does a student have to do his or her own work? For that matter, if a student who cheats ends up with a high GPA or some award or another, what do we say to the honest student who doesn't win those awards or gets a lower GPA?
How do you convince kids who are texting during a lecture or who lie to you that they should respect you enough not to do those things, when they know that you are probably making less money than their siblings who went to trade school--or, perhaps, less than they themselves make? I think now of a time I warned a student that he wasn't going to pass the class unless he made more of an effort. He shrugged his shoulders. "I have my own business. I make $100,000 a year. What do you make, prof?"
My point is, these young people know that there's no external reward for being honest, ethical, respectful and courteous. They weren't raised with anything like the notion that "Mine honour is my life, both grow as one. Take honour from me, and my life is done." If anything, what they've learned is more along the lines of "the end justifies the means."
Furthermore, even the dumbest kid has figured out what this country, culture and society--not to mention his or her own community and family--really value. I can tell you that it doesn't include putting forth extra effort, attention to detail or practicing any sort of restraint. Only chumps work any more or harder than they need to. Niceness is equated with stupidity, and gentleness and politeness--not to mention choosing not to prey on someone when the opportunity to do so presents itself-- are seen as weakness.
I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with feeling exasperation at students' behavior or frustration that you can get yourself into more trouble by trying to set the student on a good path than he or she would for behaving irresponsibly. I'm just saying that we need to remember the sources of those behaviors.
As I begin a new semester, I think of all of the irresponsible, manipulative and just plain immature behavior I've seen from students. I don't think most of us who became college faculty members had any idea that we'd encounter such things; at least, they weren't on our minds as we pursued our degrees and dreamt of "a life of the mind" or some such thing.
As much as I empathize with the other contributors, I can't help but to notice a lot of student-bashing. Yes, students' acts (or inaction) can be frustrating. And, they are--at least according to the law--adults and therefore accountable for their actions. However, I have learned that young people, whether consciously or not, almost always imitate their elders and express those values they learn from said elders, and their environments.
So the "little snowflakes" lie to your face? Make excuses? Text their friends while you're talking to them? Simply "forget" things? Well, guess what? They've figured out--again, consciously or unconsciously--that their schools, families and communities, and the society in which they live, reward such behaviors. Or, at least, those behaviors aren't penalized.
I'm thinking now of a younger man I dated a couple of years ago. The term "dysfunctional family" has been used to describe any and all kinds of unpleasantness. However, his family fits just about any definition of that term. They are all addicts of one kind or another and can only communicate with each other through screaming and threats, and navigate the turbulence (which they helped to create) of their home through all manner of lying and manipulation.
Guess what my now-ex did when he was with me. Now you know why he's an ex.
The difference is that he was old enough to choose to behave differently. Most 18- and 19-year olds are not mature enough, or simply don't have enough life experience, to know that they can be different from what they've learned how to be.
The thing is, there's absolutely no incentive for them (or my ex, for that matter) to do so. If CEO's can, through recklessness and fraud, bring the world's economy to the brink and be rewarded for their behavior with bailouts and bonuses, what can we tell young people about personal responsibility?
If politicians can lie to get themselves elected, or to take us into a war, what can we teach students about the importance of being truthful?
If schools won't stand behind their policies on plagiarism and other academic dishonesty, what reason does a student have to do his or her own work? For that matter, if a student who cheats ends up with a high GPA or some award or another, what do we say to the honest student who doesn't win those awards or gets a lower GPA?
How do you convince kids who are texting during a lecture or who lie to you that they should respect you enough not to do those things, when they know that you are probably making less money than their siblings who went to trade school--or, perhaps, less than they themselves make? I think now of a time I warned a student that he wasn't going to pass the class unless he made more of an effort. He shrugged his shoulders. "I have my own business. I make $100,000 a year. What do you make, prof?"
My point is, these young people know that there's no external reward for being honest, ethical, respectful and courteous. They weren't raised with anything like the notion that "Mine honour is my life, both grow as one. Take honour from me, and my life is done." If anything, what they've learned is more along the lines of "the end justifies the means."
Furthermore, even the dumbest kid has figured out what this country, culture and society--not to mention his or her own community and family--really value. I can tell you that it doesn't include putting forth extra effort, attention to detail or practicing any sort of restraint. Only chumps work any more or harder than they need to. Niceness is equated with stupidity, and gentleness and politeness--not to mention choosing not to prey on someone when the opportunity to do so presents itself-- are seen as weakness.
I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with feeling exasperation at students' behavior or frustration that you can get yourself into more trouble by trying to set the student on a good path than he or she would for behaving irresponsibly. I'm just saying that we need to remember the sources of those behaviors.
Young people in this country mimic their family, friends, peers, and what they see rewarded on TV, film, etc. This place is a cultural dead zone.
ReplyDeleteWhat do these "professors" expect when they recognize - or should realize - that MANY American politicians, elected officials, and business titans act like crazed chimps - at the slightest turn?!?!
When I was a student at Third Tier Drake, my administrative law "professor" once told the class that Hothead Antonin Scalia acted like a madman when he visited the school. He was a guest lecturer once. When he was taken out to dinner, he was PISSED because the restaurant did not have his favorite Italian cheese available.
Then, during a somewhat informal Q&A session, a "professor" asked him a question. Fat Bastard Scalia then dismissed him with the following, "You don't know what you are talking about." Suffice it to say, he did not even answer the question. What do you expect young, impressionable people to do, when they see a member of the Supremes acting like a diva/bitch?!?!
"Professors" and administrators, being human, also sometimes act like caged gorillas. In my contracts law class, one student was coughing consistenly. (Imagine that. Someone getting sick in freezing cold Des Moines, Iowa.) She sat two seats from me, in the very last row, of a large classroom. The "educator" - a Ms. Cathy Lesser Mansfield - coldly told her, "YOU better take that outside. I can't concentrate. Go out into the hall right now."
I have seen trial judges act like babies, and rip into lawyers for not wearing a tie. One prosecutor failed to wear a tie once to court, and the judge ripped into him - in front of his colleagues, defense lawyers, criminal defendants, and anyone else who was in court that morning. We live in a decaying society.
Nando--Yours is not the first horror story I've read or heard about Justice (sic) Scalia. And, in the interviews I've seen, he often told the interviewer he or she was wrong without explaining why.
ReplyDeleteIt's interesting that the decline civility you describe has been most precipitous among some of the so-called educated people.
When everything becomes a zero-sum game, civility is wasted effort.
ReplyDelete7:43--That should be in Bartlett's!
ReplyDelete